Neriman Distortion
by Zorknot
Summary: When Ranma died, a mysterious light and a shockwave was seen and felt throughout Nerima, affecting people who might have otherwise led normal lives. Ch. 2:Light in Darkness:Daisuke Jonouchi: "Ever since I was a kid, I wanted to be a hero."
1. Portraits from Memory

Ne_ri_MAn _DIS_**tort**ion

a Boogiepop Phantom/Ranma ½ fanfic by Zorknot

DISCLAIMER: Boogiepop Phantom is owned by Kouhei Kadono, Mediaworks, and the Right Stuff International. Ranma ½ is owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Fuji TV, and Kitty Film.

"Pone," created by Rei Harakami, "Unstability," created by Hidenobu Ito, "Torso," created by Sadesper Record, and "Penalty Taker," created by Audio Active are all copyrighted for the Boogiepop Phantom OST by Mediaworks.

Note:[10/4/11] I started this fic something like five years ago. There are a lot of experimental things going on here. For one thing, the scene breakers sometimes have japanese words, sound effects, or titles of songs from the Boogiepop Phantom soundtrack. The idea is to add to the mood, but if you find it distracting, feel free to ignore it.

Just a few things about the soundtrack. You may be able to find it on spotify or something, but in case you are only mildly interested and don't want to go through too much trouble, here are some descriptions of the songs.

"Pone" is a pensive, tonal piece of music. Usually played in introspective, philosophical moments.

"Unstability" is usually played anytime something bizarre is going on. It has a very disjointed, warped feel. It sounds a little like an angry robot that moves forward in stops and starts.

"Torso" Starts with with an electronic sound that is somewhat remeniscent of an orchestra preparing for a concert, then a light, quick tempo beat starts underneath it. The mood overall is one of action. Think long leaps off of buildings followed by frenetic chase scenes.

"Penalty Taker" is a little more intermittant than "Torso." Fast paced sections take turns with more thoughtful, echoing melodic sections. The feel is more like trying to figure out a situation, and then acting quickly to escape from it or pursue it.

~~~~~[BEGIN]~~~~~

NABIKI TENDO-a girl on a mission

AKANE TENDO-a girl possessed

TOFU ONO-a man searching for himself.

~~~~~Scene 001: Furinkan High School~~~~~

_Water drips from a drainage pipe, plunking into a pool below. The rain has come and gone, leaving the acrid smell of wet asphalt. The moon and stars are shrouded in clouds, and the streetlamps in the area do little to penetrate the night._

_It is dark, and someone is screaming._

_The terrible sound comes from above and weaves around the dripping and splashing in the walkways around the high school. It could be the wind playing through an open pipe, a small animal mewling pathetically for food or shelter...but it is simply too human. Or maybe more than human._

_Maybe it is the sound of every man and woman, every nuance of the human species crying out in sadness...in fear._

_The sound rises in pitch and then... a grotesque splattering noise. A beam of light shoots from the roof of the high school. A high-pitched buzzing now makes the terrible screams of seconds earlier seem like silence in comparison. Steel supports buckle, windows smash into the puddles of the street, a spray of blood that may have once been a man stains the wall of a nearby building... all from a wave of energy that radiates out from the beam. The lights in the windows of homes and businesses, hovels and skyscrapers go dark even as far as twenty kilometers away._

_The beam of light dissipates._

_Gradually, power is restored to the surrounding buildings. Lights return to office windows, computers flicker back on, their monitors glowing balefully in darkened labs._

_You could almost believe nothing had happened...that it had all been a bizarre hallucination. But computers show error messages that were not there before, glass shards glimmer in the light from streetlamps as they wink back on...and on a neon sign of an otherwise unremarkable pharmacy, an arc of electricity sizzles along the bend of one of the characters._

_It's tempting to believe in illusion, to discount what has occurred as something less than paranormal, but you must accept it. For in this world, everything exists. Anything can happen at any time._

_And everything does happen...all the time._

~~~~~**Vol. 01: Portraits From Memory**~~~~~

~~~~~Scene 02: St. Hebereke High School ~~~~~

"It appeared."

"What?"

"The death kami"

"Ohh... I broke a nail in Gym!"

"When?"

"About a month ago. That strange light that appeared..."

"Oh yeah! That was the same night as the explosion at the Nekohanten!"

"Weren't you working there?"

"Yeah, but I took the night off. The owner was really freaking me out."

"And all those kids disappeared at the same time...you know, the senior the otaku and..."

"Disappeared?"

"They were taken."

"By whom?"

"Baka, by the death kami of course! Are you even listening?"

"Death kami?"

"BOOGIEPOP!"

~~~~~faucet~~~~~

My classmates leave me in the bathroom. I'm washing my hands. The water pours over my fingers and through my palms in rivulets, inexorably pulled to the drain by gravity, taking away the grime that comes with the day I've lived.

I want it all gone. I want all of the past washed away. But no matter how long I rub my hands under the stream, the past won't leave me. I'm haunted by it.

I splash my face twice with the cool water, shake my hands dry and turn off the faucet. I look in the mirror, at my modest features, my wide face, my hair styled in a double ponytail, which on me somehow seems conservative. The only thing really remarkable about me is how unremarkable I am. In that way, I'm a perfect aberration. I look exactly like everyone else, but I'm really nothing like them. I spend so much time trying to fit in...that no one ever notices.

Maybe that's okay.

Those girls...they were talking about the past. That light a month ago, the disappearances...they have something to do with my encounter last night I know, but I don't know what. Last night's encounter... and the one the night before.

I remember...

That was when I still hated myself.

~~~~~St. Hebereke High School: Sophomore, Class2: **Moto Tonomura**~~~~~

The day before yesterday, I was walking down the school hallway, invisible.

I'm not invisible to everyone, just most people. Most people don't notice me at all. They walk right toward me going down the hall and then they act surprised when they bump into me. Maybe its some aura I emanate. Something that tells people subconsciously that I'm not worth their attention. If it is some power of mine though, I still haven't found a way to control it.

I was just stepping out of the way of two senior girls when short-haired, always smiling Yasuko called out, parting company with the slightly taller Junko. "Hey, Moto! Where were you? We have to go soon!"

"I don't know if I'm coming...I think..."

"Come on! You said you would yesterday!" Yasuko took my hand. She's thin, but her hand isn't bony. Her skin is smooth, aside from the small calluses she developed from Rhythmic Gymnastics.

My skin is rough, rubbed raw.

I do fairly well in Gymnastics- not the best or the worst, but average. We had a match with Furinkan the next day...without the Black Rose. Junko is the team captain now, and everyone is glad Kodachi's not around anymore. The team was planning on going to a karaoke bar after class with some boys for a pre-game celebration.

I hate Karaoke.

"It's fine," Junko said from down the hall, punching buttons into her uber-cute pink cell phone. It had a little yellow teddy bear figurine dangling from the antenna along with a strange little wooden one. "She doesn't have to come... Then again there'll be eight boys and only seven girls...the balance will be off..."

The boys were from Furinkan. Which is perhaps a little odd, but where else are you going to find dates in an all-girl school? Many of my team mates take great comfort in the fact that they have "stolen" the men from the girls of Furinkan. They often laugh and talk about how weird Furinkan girls are.

Sometimes I wish I could go to Furinkan.

"Wait a second" Yasuko held up her hand to Junko, "Come on, Moto, we're doing this for your sake. You've got to get used to them some time. Boys I mean."

"Yeah..." I muttered. Yasuko's been my friend since grade school despite our rather different dispositions. She's the reason I joined the Rhythmic Gymnastics club. She's really the reason I do almost anything.

"Great! We'll meet you at the gate okay?" Yasuko turned to Junko with a hand on her hip "She hasn't changed since junior high. She still won't go anywhere unless I drag her!"

Yasuko has a habit of talking about me as if I'm not there, which I consider a step above not noticing me at all, but I find it annoying all the same. She's different when her friends aren't around, but it's one of the reasons I sometimes wish I could disappear for real. Like the senior, the otaku, and Kuno "The Black Rose" Kodachi.

I wished then, as I had before, that Boogiepop, the kami of death, would come for me.

I grew up with the stories of the spirit that roamed the alleys and darkened streets of the city in human form, looking for its victims. It would send a glowing string of thin material into their bodies and suck out their life's energy. The victims would then convulse and gyrate as if dancing to a frenetic beat and then disappear in a shimmer of light. This spirit, this mysterious death kami that killed with dance soon became known as Boogiepop.

That's how I always wanted to die...to disappear in a shimmer of light. Some said that when Boogiepop used her glowing string it did not kill people, but sent them to a better place, that they became kami themselves. Before last night, I really didn't care either way. I just wanted to leave this world.

Now though...

~~~~~faucet~~~~

I'm washing my hands again. I don't even know when I turned the faucet on. Sometimes I spend hours in the bathroom without realizing. I'm strange that way.

I watch the water for a few moments as it pours down the drain. When I get in this state of mind, everything seems profound, like I'm seeing it for the first time, or as if the random patterns of the water in the sink might at some point coalesce into some vision of the future. I don't know. Maybe I'm just crazy.

Looking back at it, at the encounter, I suppose it must have been after effects. The aftermath of something much bigger that happened earlier. Looking at the world as a whole, the incident was really only one piece of a much larger puzzle, but it's the pieces of the puzzle that form the picture.

As far as I'm concerned, I just want to find out what the encounter meant to me personally.

~~~~~gachatsu~~~~~

I had to get my bookbag before I could leave the school with Yasuko. So I went to my classroom, used a tissue to slide the door back, and entered the room, throwing the tissue into the wastebasket by the door.

I suppose at some point in my life I must have decided that I didn't like germs, but I really can't say when it was. These things I do...using tissues to touch foreign objects, rubbing my hands with antiseptic wet wipes every night before sleeping, washing my hands perhaps a little too thoroughly...I'm not really thinking about germs when I do them, mostly its just that not doing them would be breaking some kind of contract I have with myself. I guess I'm really just afraid that if I stop these rituals, I might lose control. Or maybe it's something else...

The classroom was empty. I was pretty much the last one to leave school. That day, the teacher had us sit in a circle for discussion; so the desks were all pushed back toward the walls. Mine was the only desk that didn't have to move. On my desk, all by itself beside the window, was my bookbag. There was a tiny figurine attached to the handle. Everyone on the Gymnastics team has the same one. I had one because Yasuko had one.

I didn't use a tissue to pick up the bag, even though of course it had sat there on the desk unsupervised, and who knows what might have happened to it since I left it. Germs really have little to do with my problems, and so I just picked it up and headed for the door.

I stopped before leaving the classroom to look out the window at the sky. Ever since that light shot from the roof of Furinkan, the sky has had this strange aurora. I found myself staring at it then, much as I'm staring at the water in the sink right now. I remember saying, oddly, "It's all distorted."

It seemed to sum it all up. Not just the aurora itself but everything else that had been going on at the time. Certainly Nerima has always had a reputation for being strange, but lights in the sky, unexplained disappearances...that's strange on a different level entirely.

I was able to break my reverie in time to meet Yasuko at the gate, and before I knew it, we were at the Karaoke bar.

~~~~~mori no kuma-san~~~~~

When we met the boys there, the other girls on the team quickly found members of the opposite sex to converse with, and we separated into two groups. This was because the Karaoke booths could only hold eight people and the boys made us sixteen. The boy that was left for me, Shiro, surprised me by being somewhat attractive, although he could have stood to lose a few pounds.

I wasn't really interested. In fact, it was worse that he wasn't a total loser because I didn't have as much an excuse to ignore him.

Our half of the group sat in a room with a large TV on one end attached to a karaoke machine, a table for snacks and drinks along the center and vinyl couches along either wall. Junko had just finished her song when I heard about what happened to Ranma Saotome.

"So who's next?" Junko asked as she sat down.

I looked down at the floor, hoping my invisibility would kick in.

"I don't know let's see..." Sachiko said, flipping through the song book on her lap. Sachiko was supposedly pretty popular in school, but I knew little about her outside of Gymnastics. She was one of the ones I could beat in a match.

"You don't want to sing?" a male voice asked me. I shouldn't have looked up but I did. It was Shiro, the leftover boy. He spoke cavalierly around the straw in his mouth "That's kind of the idea here you know."

"Give her a break!" Yasuko chided, "she's not used to going to these kinds of places!"

"Hey, Sachiko," Ichiro, one of the other boys began. He was sitting across from Yasuko and I. "Did you hear about Saotome?"

"Wha?" Yasuko exclaimed in surprise.

"What about her?" Sachiko asked.

"Disappeared about a month ago. No one knows why."

"Is that so?" Yasuko said. Her smile was just a little too big.

Junko clapped her hands. "Good! That means we might have a chance against Furinkan tomorrow!"

"I don't know," Shiro noted, "Saotome might just be on a long training trip or something. That's happened before."

"Who's Saotome?" Eriko, who had transferred recently from Kyoto, asked.

"Saotome Ranma" Junko informed, "She was the first person, maybe the only person, to beat the Black Rose in the ring...She's one of those strange Furinkan girls that like to pretend they're guys."

"Hey, Saotome _is_ a guy. I took gym with him and I know for a fact that nothing's missing," A boy on the other couch, I think his name was Niro, said.

"Oh you do eh?" Sachiko teased

"I saw someone snag him in the crotch okay? Jeez! I wasn't stalking the guy or anything!"

Junko nodded. "Word is that Ranma has a twin brother who's also named Ranma for some reason. They have this little game they play where they pretend to be each other. Really weird if you ask me."

"So which one's missing?" Eriko asked.

"They both are," Satoshi said, sitting next to Yasuko. His voice lowered conspiratorially. "Believe it or not, a lot of people think they're actually the same person."

"Weird," Yasuko said and took a sip of her soda.

Satoshi turned to her and asked, "You seemed surprised when you heard his name. Did you know him from somewhere else or something?"

"Huh? No! Not at all!" Yasuko lied.

"Are you sure?" Satoshi asked teasingly.

"Yes of course!" Yasuko gave Satashi a peck on the lips. "I never met him." Yasuko assured and she and the boy started tongue wrestling.

I turned away from the scene in disgust. Maybe I just never grew up romantically, but that kind of sloppy-faced kissing just never appealed to me. I hadn't even seen Satoshi before that night.

"Yeah, Saotome was kinda freaky, I didn't hang around him too much," Niro admitted.

"Did you know him, Tonomura?" Shiro asked me suddenly.

"Um...yeah..." I said.

Sachiko waved Niro off, ignoring me. "We have freaky people too. I mean take Kodachi for example. I'm _glad_ she disappeared."

Ichiro leaned forward "What's really freaky is I heard someone saw Ranma's ghost the other day."

"Her ghost?"

"Yeah. Well..._his_ ghost really."

Niro snorted, "I think I like him better as a ghost. At least a ghost can't beat you up right?"

My attention veered to Yasuko's smiling, laughing face as she giggled at some joke that Satoshi made. Then I noticed the karaoke machine clicking into another song. "He was probably killed," I muttered to myself, "by Boogiepop."

"Huh? Boogie what?" Ichiro asked

"Oh it's just a silly rumor." Junko assured.

Shiro pointed the microphone to me insistently.

"That's right! It's Moto's turn!" Junko squealed.

I took the mic with a grimace.

I really hate karaoke.

~~~~~faucet~~~~~

After I was forced to sing "Mr. Bear of the Forest" I spent the rest of my time in that building washing my hands in the restroom. I was thinking about Ranma Saotome...about how Yasuko and I first met her...or rather him...and about how everything seemed to change after that.

"Moto!" Yasuko interrupted my woolgathering. I don't know how long she was standing behind me in the restroom. I have no sense of time when I'm like that. Like this really. I turned toward Yasuko to let her know I heard her. "You understand, right?" she asked, "I don't want Satoshi to know about Ranma. He gets really jealous, and anyway that whole thing was a little weird. Just keep it a secret okay?"

"I understand" I said.

"Good" Yasuko said and turned toward the door. She paused. "Moto..." She turned to face me. "You and I...Are we still friends?"

"Eh?"

"It's just I don't know sometimes if we're really..."

"Friends? Of course we are, right?" I tried to sound convincing.

"You're right! Why did I even ask?" Yasuko said with a nervous giggle, and then shut the door.

I looked at water coming out of the faucet. Much as I am doing now. I looked at the white, clear organized chaos as it fell predictably from the faucet to the sink yet never quite hit the same spot in the same way twice. I looked at this steady stream of distortion and thought about the past.

Ranma Saotome gave Yasuko her first kiss.

~~~~~Scene003: Junior High Summer~~~~~

Yasuko used to be a lot like me. She was a pretty quiet girl till two years ago, the summer after our last year of junior high. One day, we were walking from school when Saotome approached us, pigtailed and in a red and black Chinese outfit. He had a slightly dazed expression on his face...and a pink band-aid on the bridge of his nose.

Before either of us knew what to make of the strange boy, he took Yasuko's hand and said, "My name is Ranma Saotome. You're very beautiful, is it okay if I kiss you?" And then he did.

Yasuko melted into it, and I stared, shocked, as it happened. Then a very angry girl with short bluish black hair and wearing a Furinkan High uniform yelled "Ranma no baka!" and kicked Saotome high into the air.

Until that point, neither Yasuko nor I had ever imagined we'd have any romantic relationships until we were something like thirty-five and had respectable jobs doing... whatever. I suppose it's strange enough that we were still virgins going into High School, and even stranger that we weren't even looking for sex. But that's how we were. It all seemed pointless to us. But then Saotome kissed Yasuko.

She developed a major crush from that, and she spent the rest of that week finding out all she could about Ranma Saotome. Unfortunately, she found out fairly quickly that he was already engaged to several girls, that the only reason he had been so forward in the first place was that he had a cursed band-aid on his face that made him be affectionate to whomever he saw, that this sort of thing was normal for him, and finally that Kuno "the Black Rose" Kodachi was already in love with him. Yes, he was THAT Ranma-sama.

Ranma was completely out of Yasuko's league, but still, she absorbed every rumor and story that she could about him. She would press anyone from Furinkan for information about Saotome, both boys and girls. Gradually, she asked less and less girls though. Soon, she was actively dating. She started to become more confident, while I...I became even less comfortable around boys.

~~~~~childhood~~~~~

When she lost her virginity, she became more of free spirit.

She flirted with guys all the time. I asked her once if she had found anything out about Saotome and she gave me an odd look. She said she was completely over him.

But...

~~~~~pone~~~~~

I was walking alone back to my house one day after school. I was in my first year at St. Hebereke. Since I started there, often when I don't have company I take the scenic route alongside the canal. I like hearing the sounds of the water, watching it sparkle in the sun. That day though, it was overcast. It started to rain, and I didn't have an umbrella; so I jumped over the fence and ran under a bridge to wait it out, thanking my Rhythmic Gymnastics training under the Black Rose's tutelage.

I sat there for a while, watching the water pass by and thinking about Yasuko and how much she had changed. But then I noticed a figure silhouetted against the pale sky. A pigtailed girl carrying some kind of dead animal in her left hand.

"Um...sorry," the figure said with a bow and turned away.

I just sat looking at the water as the rain came down in sheets outside the shelter of the bridge. The figure returned. "Look, what's wrong? Cause this is my place to sulk and it's really no fair you stealing it."

"Nothing's wrong," I said with a shrug.

"Right. Not gonna be easy I guess. Then again, nothing is I s'pose." The girl walked toward me and sat down, throwing the animal on the ground next to her.

I could see her face then. It was familiar. It was the girl that beat Kodachi in Gymnastics. I was still in junior high during that match, but I had seen the game. It was Ranma Saotome. And although it was the female Ranma, if Yasuko's stories were to be believed, she was really close to the male version.

"Look, I can't have other people sulking in my spot. Either tell me what's going on or leave."

"You're...Ranma..."

Ranma raised an eyebrow at me. "Yeah. You're from St. Hebereke, right? Musta made an impression at the match...what's your name?"

"Tonomura...Moto."

"Moto, huh? So what's up? Your boyfriend leave ya or something?"

"No. No boyfriend."

"Oh. You feelin kinda lonely then is that it? No friends, no one understands you, you feel completely apart from everything but people still expect you to participate?"

I didn't say anything. People don't understand that just because I'm a little pensive from time to time it doesn't mean that I'm sad. Still, Ranma was hitting a little too close to the mark for me to deny what she said.

Ranma sighed. "Well join the club. You got it better than me I bet."

"Eh?"

"You scared of cats?"

I shook my head.

"Guess how I got this." Ranma picked up the dead animal...it was a rabbit.

Yasuko had told me almost all the stories she heard about Ranma. There were a few about this strange mental problem she had with cats. Ranma was extremely afraid of them, but if there were enough of them, or she couldn't get away, she would actually start to believe she was one. "Nekoken?"

"Yeah. Nekoken. Guess you know more about me then you let on. You're not engaged to me or anything are you?"

I shook my head. I was a little confused. I remembered suddenly that it was the _male_ Ranma that had the Nekoken training. But it was so hard to keep track, what with the names being the same and all.

"Oh right. I'm a girl right now. I forget, you know." Ranma picked up a pebble and threw it into the canal. "I guess if you were engaged to me you wouldn't be saying you didn't have a boyfriend."

"Eh?"

"Forget about it. It's just..." Ranma looked off into the rain, clenching a fist. Suddenly she slammed it into the ground. "It's just I got a lot of people who want a piece of me. I'm sick of it. Even Akane. Especially Akane. I mean what does she care even if I DID want to go shag every girl that I ran into? Don't get me wrong, Akane's great. She's helped me out of more fixes than I can count and she's actually pretty fun most the time...but the girl's got problems you know? Not that I don't have my own but..."

It was a tad surreal to be hearing all this from a busty red-headed girl, and I guess I must have stared or something because Ranma paused.

"Hey, stop looking at me like I just grew a second head. I got a curse in China okay? I turn into a girl whenever I get splashed with cold water, and I change back with hot water. Why is that so hard for everyone to understand?"

"You...you change with water?"

"Yeah." Ranma scratched the back of her head. "I guess that might actually be stranger than the second head scenario."

She and I were quiet for a while. Shivering, Ranma squeezed the water out of her shirt. She stared at it for awhile as it dripped. "You know, ever since Jusenkyo I've had this fascination with the stuff? With water. Most normal thing in the world and yet..."

"It's always changing, flowing, going somewhere."

"Yeah. How does it do that?"

I shrugged and just watched the surface of the canal. I was sitting next to Ranma Saotome. It was THE Ranma Saotome. The one Yasuko had wanted, the one the Black Rose was in love with. I wanted to say something... to acknowledge that somehow with words, but I just couldn't think of anything appropriate.

"So what's the deal? You're not ugly or anything, how come you don't have any friends?"

"I have a friend." I found myself saying.

"Then leave. You should be with your friend. This is my spot."

"It's raining."

"Yeah. Well you ain't that sweet; you'll live."

I didn't move. I really didn't even think of moving. I felt like I needed to be there somehow.

Ranma took in a breath and let it out. "If you were Akane, I'd have a concussion by now."

I nodded. I figured that was the girl who punted Ranma that one time. The one I heard about from Yasuko's stories.

"So what's your friend like, Moto?" Ranma asked.

I shrugged.

"You have a falling out or something?"

I hesitated for a moment, and then I nodded. That was more or less what happened.

"That's rough. I had a friend when I was a kid, we did everything together, and then my Pops made me leave. Five years later, I see him again, only I find out he's a girl and engaged to me. How'm I supposed to deal with that huh? I just about gave up on trying to be friends with her again. All she wants is to marry me now. I'm seventeen! Why can't they cut me some slack? I mean just today...I'm walking with Akane, and we're actually almost getting along, and then Shampoo jumps out and gives me the Amazonian embrace of death. Then Akane goes ballistic and douses both of us with a hose. Shampoo turns into a cat, which of course makes me go into Nekoken, and the next thing I know it's raining and I'm carrying a dead rabbit in my mouth. I mean really. Has anything like that ever happened to you?"

I shook my head.

"Exactly. It ain't normal. I can't even be friends with any of them without the others getting suspicious, and they all expect me marry them...to love them? I have enough trouble convincing myself that getting a period doesn't make me any less of a man!"

"You...you get periods?"

"Yeah. Mostly I just make extra careful not to be a girl during them and its fine but...yeah. It freaks me out."

A barge passed by us under the bridge. Ranma and I both watched it in silence. It was funny, but I hadn't thought of Ranma as a real person until that point. All those stories that Yasuko told me...they were like tall tales, almost like the stories about Boogiepop. It made me wonder if maybe Boogiepop was a real person too.

"You know this is the first time I killed anything?"

"Eh?"

"This rabbit. It didn't do anything to me. I wasn't hungry or anything. But I killed it."

"It's not your fault."

"No. No, it _is_ my fault. All of it. I should have never allowed any of it go on. I just...I just want everyone to be happy. I just want them to...I don't know, get along. Be friends. Damn that sounds sappy. Heh...I've been trying to give everyone what they want. Pops, Akane, Ukyo, Shampoo...and all this time I've really been selfish. I should just let them hate me."

"That doesn't make any sense..."

"Maybe it doesn't. I'm just babbling here okay? But...maybe it does." Ranma picked up the rabbit by the ears. She turned it around looking at its open mouth, the jagged wounds in its side that made smudged bloodstains in the once snow white fur. It looked like it might have been someone's pet at one time. "I wonder...why do they even bother to live?" Ranma said. "They all die anyway."

I looked at the rabbit, then at the canal, moving eternally without ever going any where. Yes," I said, "You're right."

That was when I knew that Ranma didn't really love them. Her fiancées. Any of them.

And then...I don't know how it started, but I was helplessly falling for her.

~~~~~Scene:004: The Present~~~~~

The night before last, walking from the karaoke bar with the others...I couldn't stop thinking about that day.

I never saw Saotome again, and I kept my feelings a secret. Not only was it like I was betraying Yasuko, but also...Saotome was a girl, at least when I talked to her she was. She acted so much like a boy, but still... I've never felt that way about anyone before or since. I wasn't sure what that meant. I'm still not sure. Not only that, but Ranma was the enemy of the Gymnastics team. Female Ranma had beaten our old captain and male Ranma, well he was the boy the crazy captain was in love with; so that was even worse.

I didn't dare share my feelings with anyone. I suppressed them as much as I could. And I convinced myself over the months that my feelings for Saotome had started to fade, but that night, less than forty-eight hours ago...they were back.

The girls on the team and their dates were walking to a night club where there would be dancing. I fell behind them in an alleyway. I wanted to talk to Saotome again. I needed to. I started to feel a strange buzzing in my brain. I began to feel faint. I crouched to the ground to steady myself...

"Moto, are you coming or not?" Yasuko asked.

I didn't respond. I just knelt there on the pavement. I sensed something behind me and I turned around...

~~~~~unstability~~~~~

I saw lights in the darkness of the alley...lots of tiny lights like sparks of electricity, only larger. They came together growing brighter and finally taking the shape of a person, a boy.

Saotome.

He looked up at me and he drifted toward me. He looked like he was about to kiss me.

I screamed.

I screamed and ran away. I ran all the way home, and I spent the rest of that night, through supper and watching mindless TV shows...just trying to convince myself that what I saw hadn't happened.

~~~~~beep beep~~~~~

I woke up yesterday to the alarm and to my Dad opening my door to check on me. I keep telling him not to open my door but he still does it. I told him again as I turned off the alarm. I know Dad cares but...every time he does that I get this compulsion...

I pulled out four or five wet wipes from the container I keep by my bed and rubbed the handle of my door where my father had touched. It's not about germs. I don't know what it is that makes me do things like that. Maybe it has something to do with how my father married another woman after mom died...

Suddenly I remembered seeing Saotome that night. I pulled out five more tissues and rubbed my hands. Over and over again I rubbed them, till tears came to my eyes from the pain, till the backs of my hands were beet red, cracked and bleeding.

I want it all gone. I want the past to go away...

~~~~~chaos~~~

Why?

Why are we alive?

I mean, we all die anyway...

~~~~~traffic~~~~~

As I was walking to school yesterday morning in my jogging suit, I passed by a store window. It had manikins, headless and armless, sporting the latest fashions. I found myself stopping to look. Could I ever be the type of girl who would wear those sorts of clothes? They all seemed be geared toward sex. And the only one I ever loved...was he dead? Was that his ghost I saw?

It all seemed pointless just then...Saotome, my problems with Yasuko, the match with Furinkan. It was all just a flash in the pan of a much bigger, darker world.

There was a girl leaning on a railing of the walking bridge that stretched over the street. She was dressed in a pink skirt fringed everywhere with lace and giggling as she reached for something I couldn't see. She must have been at least fifteen really, but she was acting like she was five, or even just a few months old. And I wondered why she was alive. What sort of life could someone like that lead? And what was the point?

I didn't have an answer. I just walked the rest of the way to St. Hebereke High School, trying to focus on the match ahead.

~~~~~torso~~~~~

The team left Hebereke High together for Furinkan. Even I was excited about it...but I think it was more that I was going to see the inside of that place as opposed to any school spirit.

I actually won two of my three matches against Furinkan. The first match was against a blond-haired girl. American, I think. Poor thing had this haunted expression on her face almost all the time, like she had no idea what was going on. I've heard that, in America and many other countries, they don't consider Gymnastics a martial art. It always seemed silly to me. Why else would you want to be able to do a midair triple somersault? It doesn't help with knitting or cooking or keeping a family together under economic strain as far as I can figure.

I just threw my favorite weapon, the medicine ball, at her with an underhanded toss, and she didn't dodge or anything, she just folded over it with an "oomph" and sailed right out the ring. Easiest match I ever had.

The next match was more interesting.

The rules of Martial Arts Rythmic Gymnastics are rather lax. You simply have to throw someone out of the ring without directly using your hands or feet. You can use wrists; you can use ankles. As long as your hand never touches your opponent you can even put her in a choke hold, though that's considered rather low class. And you can use just about any tool you can think of. My second opponent used a metal pole...and a can of termites.

The rings consist of canvas over a wire lattice connected by springs to a wooden frame. The girl must have been using mutant termites or something, because afterward all that was left was the wire lattice and a few boards from the gymnasium floor over the ground below. And only a few seconds after that, the termites died. Apparently, the girl was to the field of entomology what Kodachi was to botany. Lucky for me, she wasn't all that skilled. When she was balancing on her pole, and I was standing on the last remaining post of the square ring, I threw a medicine ball at her. She started to fall and I launched myself at her, slamming into her with my knees. She landed outside of the ring, and I landed on top of her. Since no part of me was touching the ground outside the ring and as I was balancing on my knees on top of her, not using my feet or hands, I won that one as well.

Furinkan High, being no stranger to destruction, already had a spare ring ready and the tournament proceeded.

In my third match, though, I had no chance. It was terrible. Not because I lost, but... If I had known who I was going to be fighting, I would have forfeited. The girl wore a pretty standard blue leotard, but the bandoliers of spatulas complete with the large one harnessed to the back bothered me. They were odd weapons, but more than that, there was something about someone wielding spatulas that I thought I should remember. Then the announcer called out our names. I, Tonomura Moto was fighting Kuonji Ukyo. Ranma's childhood friend and fiancée.

I was so wrapped up in thinking about the implications that I didn't see the volley of spatulas headed toward me until too late. I dodged them as best I could but I received some pretty deep cuts on my forearms as I blocked the ones I couldn't avoid.

I called for my medicine ball, and when I had it, I threw it with all my might at the spatula girl, but she stepped to the side and, smooth as anything, brought out her big spatula, swung it, and hit the ball right back toward me. I jumped away and it broke clean through the post behind me and into the gymnasium floor. Ukyo meant business.

I called for my ribbon and tried to see if I could disarm her, but it didn't work. The ribbon wrapped around the handle of the oversize spatula, but Ukyo yanked hard and the handle of the ribbon slipped out of my grasp. Then she started using the ribbon to swing the giant spatula again and again in a widening gyre. The mass of sharp metal came zooming toward me at high speed over and over. The posts were all cut down now, and I had to keep jumping over the ribbon to keep from getting clothes lined. Finally, the ribbon unraveled and the spatula went flying through a wall.

Ukyo screamed in frustration. I knew it was only her anger that was allowing me to get as far as I had. But I could not quite bring myself to end the match by jumping out of the ring. It was the same thing as watching the water...Ukyo was so angry, yet she also seemed tired somehow, as if she had been fighting for far longer than the span of the tournament. Her eyes were strange, focused and distant. Part of her cared so much, and part of her had stopped caring. She was like a spinning top, somehow staying in equilibrium but at any moment...

She started talking. Grumbling really at first, but then the words rose in volume and pitch. "Twelve years," She said. "Twelve years I've dedicated to you. I renounced my womanhood, for a decade I trained so that I could kill you..."

Her battle aura rose into the visible spectrum. It grew larger, folded back on itself. "Then when I found you, I forgave you. My entire purpose in life was to kill you, and I gave that up. I gutted my soul and threw its meat on the dirt to rot. I did that for you. I thought you would heal the wound, fill my soul with your love. But you just let it fester. You just ignored me."

She was crying then, and I was reminded of those videos they showed us in school about earthquakes, where they have a building on a shaking foundation, and bits of it start to drop off. "I became a woman again for you. I thought that's what you wanted. Do you realize how hard that was? Harder even than becoming a man. But you didn't care. I was nothing to you. Invisible. You just bumped past me and went on as if I wasn't there. You left me. You left me for the one woman you swore you would never love."

The battle aura turned positively scary. It was a vibrant purple that kept curling and roiling within itself like a thundercloud through time elapse. It kept getting darker too. It seemed to steal all the light from the room. Ukyo looked up at the ceiling. "I'm wearing a leotard, Ranma, just like her. And I can be every bit as evil. Is that what you want? Will that be enough?" The girl was barely visible now through her inky dark aura. It was dark, so dark...and now she was screaming "Will anything be enough? What do I need to do?"

And then a tendril of that inky blackness drifted toward me, and I was still transfixed. It surrounded me, suffocated me. Too late, I started to struggle against it.

"Should I kill her? Will that make you come back?" Ukyo's voice was more subdued, but the pain that trilled through made it even more powerful.

The purple-black smoky tendril of Ukyo's aura squeezed harder... and maybe I felt a little of her pain, because I, too, am invisible, because I too loved Ranma. But I couldn't succumb to it. I found a breath within myself and rasped, "All Ranma wanted was to be your friend." The aura dissipated, and for a moment, I was free. I didn't waste any time. I jumped, backward somersaulting once in the air before landing on my feet...outside the ring.

I watched the referee lift Ukyo's hand up, declaring her the victor. Ukyo was still crying, almost doubled over in tears. And then I realized...I was crying too. There was no way Ranma would ever love Ukyo, and there was no way he was ever going to love me.

I needed to wash my hands. To wash this feeling away. I started walking toward the gym exit, but Yasuko stopped me.

"Moto, look at your arms! You're going to bleed to death if you don't get some help!"

I looked. The cuts were much deeper than I had thought. My forearms were covered in blood, and there was a trail of drops all the way back to the ring. Suddenly I felt faint. Yasuko threw my arm over her shoulder and hurried me to the locker room where there was a first aid kit.

~~~~~pone~~~~~

"Moto," She said after we were both sitting on a bench and she was wrapping my arm in a tight bandage after washing it, "I want to give you something."

"Hmm?"

She tied off the bandage and went to her duffle bag. It was red and the zipper had a little wooden figurine on it, just like mine and Junko's. "You know you gave me a scare last night. The way you ran away screaming. And now what happened with Ukyo, are you sure you're alright?"

"I'm fine," I said, "It was nothing."

Yasuko shrugged, opened the bag and took out a wide, pink, three-ring binder. "At first, I was going to burn them all, but then I thought, maybe someday I would want to remember..."

She opened the binder. Flipping through the pages of photos, I saw pictures of Ranma: fighting, half-dressed, even one nude from the back. Later on, there were pictures of female Ranma as well. Yasuko blushed a little, "Ranma got a curse. He turns into a girl with cold water. I never told you because...well it was just too weird and I wasn't sure if...you know."

I nodded. Aside from the inclusion of the female form with the male, I noticed a trend. In each successive picture, he was angrier, more violent. There was this glint that started to appear in his eye. It made me think of the dead rabbit. That was the first time he had killed anything. Had he killed other things since then? If he was this different when Yasuko was over him, what had happened in the year since?

The last picture was different from the others. It wasn't fighting. It wasn't sexual. It was Ranma in female form, slouched against a doorway during a sunset, one leg out, the other tucked under her. On her cheek there was a single tear. Yasuko noticed I was looking at it. "Nabiki made me pay extra for that one. I didn't mind. It's beautiful don't you think?"

I nodded.

"When I saw it, though, I knew it would be the last photo I'd buy. I told Nabiki that and she didn't argue. I asked why Ranma was crying. Nabiki said...she said she wished she knew."

"Nabiki?" I asked.

"Tendo Nabiki. Akane's older sister. I used to get most my information from her. Sometimes I would tell her things that were going on in St. Hebereke for money; so I saw her every now and then even after I stopped buying photos. She graduated last year though, and I haven't really talked to her since. I think I might have seen her in the bleachers today, but I'm not sure. Her hair was different."

"Did Ranma and Kodachi really...?"

"Yes. You know how Kodachi stopped showing up to class a couple months ago?"

I nodded. That a few weeks before the giant light shot from the roof of Furinkan.

"I decided I'd do a little spying, so I followed Kodachi out of her house to see where she went. She met Ranma underneath a bridge and...I don't know for sure, I was trying to stay hidden, but...I think they were selling drugs to somebody."

I swallowed the growing lump in my throat.

"I always thought, even after I gave up on him, that Ranma was beyond that sort of thing, that despite his superficial faults, inside he was a good person, someone with moral integrity. I thought he had a perfect soul." Yasuko looked up at the fluorescent light of the locker room. "I guess I was wrong."

"I guess..."

"Anyway," Yasuko shook her head and smiled as if to say she was just being silly, "I wanted to give this to you. Satoshi has been coming over a lot recently and I don't want him finding out. And...I get a queasy feeling every time I think of Saotome now. I know I can trust you, though, and somehow I just don't think it would be right to burn it. Will you take care of it for me?"

I closed the binder and looked at the plastic pink of its cover. I could see a vague shadow of my reflection in it. Yasuko trusted me. She didn't know about me and Ranma. And Ranma...drugs...somehow I felt like it was my fault.

"Moto?"

"Yes...um...I'll take care of it." I got up and put the notebook in my duffle bag. Then, getting a chill, I decided to go ahead and put my jogging suit on over my leotard.

"Thanks, Moto, this means a lot." Yasuko shook her head and laughed. "Here I am talking about Ranma again, right after you nearly got killed by one of his fiancées! I'm so sorry. I must be a terrible friend."

"No...it's okay. Kuonji-san was just very upset..."

"Yeah she took the news harder than anyone. Did you hear what she did at the failed wedding last year?"

"Failed wedding?"

"Yeah, Ranma had almost been married to Akane, and Ukyo and Shampoo tried to 'save' him from it by throwing explosives on them both during the ceremony. I met Ukyo a few times at her restaurant. I always got the impression she was relatively sane, but I guess she came a little unhinged when she heard about the wedding. I don't know if she ever recovered really, and then hearing about Ranma and Kodachi must have driven her over the edge."

I pulled my hair out of the collar of my sweatshirt. "I...didn't know..."

"I found out from Nabiki. She didn't ask for money or anything. I think she was upset...I'm sorry I never really thought to tell you. You always seem distant when I talk about Ranma, like you're ignoring me or something." Yasuko stood up and stretched. "I should probably get dressed myself. You did better than I did. I feel like such a loser going out my first round."

I nodded sympathetically as I picked up my bag. New pain flashed across my forearms and I winced.

"You should probably go see a nurse about those cuts, make sure they don't need stitches." Yasuko advised.

"I'll go now," I said. "See you."

"Later!" Yasuko waved.

~~~~~penalty taker~~~~~

I had to ask someone where the Nurse's office was, but I eventually found it. I rummaged in my duffle bag, found my wet wipes and used a tissue to open the door. "Please excuse my rudeness." I said as I walked in and closed the door behind me, my eyes to the floor. When I looked up, I expected to see the nurse. I saw a pervert instead.

Looking out under the blinds of the office window, was a black-haired boy in a blue Furinkan uniform. When I came in, he turned around and his eyes went immediately to my breasts. "The nurse isn't here." He said, continuing to stare. His eyes were strange, manic almost.

I never had to deal with perverts before. I go to an all girl school and usually people didn't notice me much at all. While this boy may not have seen me, he saw my breasts, and I didn't know what to do. I stepped back.

He stepped forward.

I had a thought of rushing past him into the larger examination room, but after I took three quick steps he blocked my path. He reached toward my chest. "Um..." I said in protest.

"Don't move!" he said.

My back now to a cabinet full of medicine, I tried to backpedal again, but I hit the cabinet, knocking over a two bottles of pills. One shattered next to my foot; the other rolled along the floor. The sound seemed louder than normal, distorted.

The boy came closer, almost touching me. I gasped.

The boy paused, looked up at my face. "I'm sorry," he said, bringing his hand back to his side. "There's a bug attached to your heart. I understand if you don't want me to touch you, but if you let it, that bug is going to completely devour you."

"Huh?"

"It's that knot you feel inside your heart. I've been able to see these things recently."

I edged toward the door. I was even more frightened just then.

"You've been keeping your feelings bottled up, haven't you? For a long time now." He smiled. "I'm Daisuke Jonochi, a senior." He walked to the door and slid it open. Before he left he turned back to look at me. "Let me know if you ever want me to grope your chest. It's better than letting that bug eat you up, right?" He chuckled and closed the door.

Thinking back, maybe a pervert was all that Daisuke was, but just then, I thought,

_He's right... For a long time now..._

I had to get out of that room.

~~~~~Scene 005: Furinkan High School~~~~~

I wandered the mostly empty halls of the high school for a long time. I knew nothing would happen, but still, I explored every inch of that school that I could, trying to get some feel for the places Saotome Ranma once was.

I tried to imagine Ranma running, Ranma sleeping in class, Ranma fighting. I knew nothing about her, or him. And yet I felt like I knew more about Ranma than anyone. I understood her. I knew why she was crying in the photo. I wanted her so much for her to be around the corner, to appear. I wanted..._needed_ Ranma to be there...to be alive.

But of course she never showed.

When I was finally ready to go back to the tournament, it was almost dark, and everyone was leaving. In the gym, a throng of cheering Furinkan High gymnasts clustered around the victor of the tournament, Tendo Akane. Ranma's main fiancée. She had two duffle bags, one fairly small and another enormous, the zippers on it straining.

She was laughing. Smiling.

I found myself walking toward the scene, trying to figure out how the one who was nominally the closest to Ranma could be so care free after her disappearance.

She must have noticed me looking at her.

"Do you need something?" She asked, once she was back on the ground.

I shook my head no.

"You're from St. Hebereke right? Hey! You're the one that fought Ukyo aren't you? I'm really sorry about that. Are you sure you don't need anything?"

I almost shook my head again, but then I thought... "Is...is your sister, Nabiki, still here?"

Akane's eyes widened and she came closer to me. "You want to see her? I'll go with you. She can be a little scary, but if we both explain it to her, it should be alright."

One of the other girls spoke up, "I think I saw Nabiki leave earlier. She looked kind of angry."

"She _always_ looks angry," a younger girl pointed out.

Akane turned to me, "Well, what do you want to do? I'd offer to take you to the dojo, but the girls and I were planning to go celebrate."

"It's okay," I said.

"Akane, we might miss the movie!" one of the girls said and they all started running toward the locker room.

Akane paused. "You're really okay?"

I nodded.

"Well then...Later!" and Akane practically skipped after the other girls.

I never felt so terrible in all my life.

~~~~~ cathedral~~~~~

I didn't go home with the other St. Hebereke girls. And I couldn't stay at Furinkan forever. I had nowhere else to go. I walked through the city in the night. My legs followed Ranma's trail...even though there was no trace of her.

I ended up in the alley from the previous night.

I felt the wall of the alley.

That grimy, germ-infested mass of concrete, a surface that may well have been urinated or defecated on by some enterprising vagrant...I felt it with my bare hand.

I needed to feel some trace of Ranma. Anything. I put my hand against the wall, closed my eyes and didn't even think of the wet wipes still in my duffle bag.

I felt something...

~~~~~doki doki~~~~~

I looked up, and there was a flash of light, a sizzle of electricity that moved across a power line overhead.

I didn't really think; I just followed it.

~~~~~unstability~~~~~

I chased it for at least five blocks, past store fronts and pedestrian crossings, past police cars and street lights, until I wasn't really sure where I was or where I was going.

"Come," I heard Ranma's voice, "this way."

Then I came to a dead end. An alley that ended with a raised train track, its bed some twenty feet above where I stood, a chain link fence guarding the drop-off below.

That was when Ranma appeared again.

Just like before, the sparks of light grew larger, combined. This time it was female Ranma. Just as I remembered her from that rainy day a year ago.

"I finally found you, Saotome-kun."

~~~~~traffic~~~~~

_A girl in a jogging suit from Furinkan High walks down the sidewalk. She carries two duffle bags, one relatively small, the other almost ridiculously large. _

_The girl bumps into a man in a suit, unable to avoid him with her added girth from the bag. When the bag collides with the man, it makes an odd jingling sound. _

"_Excuse me," the girl mumbles to the man as he looks back angrily and walks on._

_Was that a normal sound to hear from a bag? Or did it maybe have a strange timbre...some otherworldly quality?_

~~~~~trains~~~~~

In that dark alley, Ranma appeared.

I didn't question it. If I let one shred of doubt in at that moment I may have gone insane. I had to make up for all that lost time.

"Saotome-kun...I...I wanted to tell you something. For...for a long time now, but I couldn't because of Yasuko...but by not telling you, the knot in my heart kept tightening...So..." I took a breath. A train passed by, and maybe she wouldn't have heard my words anyway. But I said them. "I love you! I've always loved you! And I don't care if you're a boy or a girl, I don't care if you just want me as a friend. I'd be happy to be your friend and nothing more! You don't have to have people hate you! I will never hate you! I...I just wanted to let you know...I'm here for you, Ranma! I'm here for you!"

Ranma changed forms then. Female to male. He had a smirk to his lips...but there was a darkness to his eyes...

"Who the fuck are you?" He said it casually, evenly... as if amused by some strange, yet inconsequential thing he found. "Were you a friend of Saotome Ranma's?"

"You don't remember me?"

"Well," He said condescendingly, "it was very good that you were his friend."

I fell to my knees on the grimy pavement. "Yes... it was very good."

It was then that I realized that Ranma was dead.

I think I died too then. That last remaining spark that kept me going all these years...it winked out and I was just a husk.

"It's been a long time since I've fed," Ranma said, walking behind me and brushing my hair from the back of my neck. "I'm going to devour you."

"Are you going to kill me?" I asked. I was merely curious at that point, no longer caring either way.

"Yeah," he replied, "you'll really be dying."

"That's good," I said, "It's good that you're the one that will be killing me."

~~~~~unstability~~~~~

I heard a squishing sound and felt hot breath on my neck. Something touched me there, I think it was a finger, but of course I didn't know... and I didn't care. I just wanted to be gone. Erased. To disappear for real instead of being merely invisible. And if it was Ranma that was doing it, all the better.

Then I heard the words, "That is not Saotome Ranma." I turned to see who said it and Ranma pulled my hair so that my head came back, making me scream involuntarily. Then suddenly his grip loosened and I was free to turn around.

I saw a string of light, coming straight out Ranma's forehead. Then he started shaking violently, like he had just been struck by a jolt of electricity or...like he was dancing. He disappeared then, turning into sparks of light.

I was so ready to disappear... to be erased...I stared at the ground stunned as the words passed through my ears.

"It used Ranma's form, but it is not Ranma. It is a man eater, borrowing his appearance to feed."

"A man eater?" I asked, not lifting my head. I didn't want to see my savior. I think I was worried that if I did, it wouldn't be Boogiepop, but some normal person.

"It has lost its earthly form and been rendered harmless to humans. The problem is when some troubled soul like you offers it their life. Even if it eats you, it doesn't mean you were killed by Ranma." I heard footsteps as my savior started to walk away. "Forget about Saotome Ranma," she said, "He's dead...I killed him."

I looked up then. And I saw the dark cloak, the cylindrical cloth hat, the floating ribbons with the triangular pattern...it _was_ Boogiepop! But why did she kill him? How did he die? But for some reason I didn't think to ask her then. Really, even then I don't think I cared. Ranma was dead...after that what was the point?. So I didn't say anything to Boogiepop, even if maybe I would have liked to. I just watched her fade into the night.

Then I broke down and cried. I cried for what seemed like hours. Or maybe an eternity.

~~~~~faucet~~~~~

I'm not sure now if that was Boogiepop or not. I could have...simply imagined it all. But even if it was, nothing much has changed. I still hate myself. I'm washing my hands now just like I did two days ago. Still trying to forget the past.

I turn off the faucet and exit the bathroom. As I'm walking down the hall, Yasuko comes up to me, "What are you doing today?" she asks, and before I say anything, she says, "Good, I'll meet you at the gate okay?" and runs off.

Only marginally better then not paying attention to me at all. Maybe I should go back to that alleyway and let the man eater eat me. Even if it's not Ranma.

I look up, and the fluorescent light above me starts to flicker.

The thing is, I can't quite bring myself to really wish it. Nothing has changed, but for now...somehow...

~~~~~traffic~~~~~

I didn't meet Yasuko at the gate. She might've brought something up that would have made me remember what happened. I just want to be alone right now. Right now I don't mind being invisible so much.

I'm on my way home, but I've stopped. There's a sharp incline just before you get to the shopping center above the streets. I'm standing there, my book bag at my feet. The wind is blowing through my hair. I think I might be smiling. And I try to remember when the last time I did that was.

I realize what I'm looking at is the same alley that I was in last night. Except now it's daylight and I'm looking down into it over the train track. I could go back there. I could let the man eater devour me, but for now...I think I'm alive. I think I'll stay living for a while...

Maybe.

~~~~~[END]~~~~~

Thanks go to Black Dragon for prereading.

The next chapter focuses on Daisuke, running from forces he cannot comprehend and remembering the times he could fight back.


	2. Light in Darkness

Ne_ri_MAn _DIS_**tort**ion

a Boogiepop Phantom/Ranma ½ fanfic by Zorknot

DISCLAIMER: Boogiepop Phantom is owned by Kouhei Kadono, Mediaworks, and the Right Stuff International. Ranma ½ is owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Fuji TV, and Kitty Film.

"Pone," created by Rei Harakami; "Penalty Taker," created by Audio Active; and "Happy Ending," created by Flare are all copyrighted for the Boogiepop Phantom OST by Mediaworks.

Happy Ending is has a peppy rhythm, but still manages to be rather melancholy. It sounds a bit like a dance remix of wind chimes moving while rain falls lightly to the ground.

Author's Note: Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. For those that enjoyed it, I hope you like this one as well. For those that were a bit confused, I don't blame you. Several things were left purposely unclear. Each of these chapters is told from the perspective of what would normally be an ancillary character. They don't know everything that's going on. The idea is that you're supposed to piece it together from all the different accounts. So it's kind of a mystery as well as a collection of weird, spooky stories. I should also say that if you like Ranma to be a paragon of strength and virtue, this probably isn't going to be your cup of tea. At all. If it helps, though, you can think of this as what might happen if Ranma wasn't as strong as he seems to be in canon. What if he finally cracked? What would be the fallout? That's kind of what this is about. That and there was an accident at a biotech lab that released a monster that killed people and took their form and whose tears made them psychotic...but we'll go into that later.

~~~~~[BEGIN]~~~~~

_In__ a__ dream __you __pass __them__ one__ after __another ... these__ blurry __lights __overhead __in __the __darkness.__ You__ hear __a __sound,__ but __it__ seems __blurry too, __somehow__.__ It__'__s __vaguely __human, __only __there__'__s __something__ wrong __about __it... in __fact__ maybe __it__'__s__ panting,__ like__ someone __running...__someone __running __away__ from __something... __and __those __lights __overhead...yes. __They__ are__ street__lamps._

_A green and white sneaker splashes into a puddle in an alley way, sending a chaotic crown of water into the air along with a soda can and several paper wrappers that until this moment had lain undisturbed. The owner of the sneaker, a young man with black hair maybe in his late teens, is scrambling toward a parked white minivan when he slips and falls backward into the gutter. As he gets up, he watches the alley in front of him, panting, his eyes and mouth wide open in abject horror. _

_In the alley, amid the refuse next to an old abandoned washing machine, a phantom fades into being. It is female, wearing a strange, somewhat cylindrical cloth hat and a dark cloak decorated with two floating bands of black and white triangle patterns. It has pale blue eyes locked in a menacing half-lidded stare. One side of the mouth rises minutely as if in mild amusement._

_Gasping__ in __fright, __the __young __man __stumbles __to__ his __feet __and __runs __down __the __side__walk __along __the__ street. __He __runs... and __he __seems __past __the __point __of__ exhaustion __already,__ pumping __arms__ and __legs__ haphazardly __by __the__ strength__ of __his __fear __alone, __as __the __street__lamps__ shine__ watchfully, __sentinels __of __the __night_.

_It__'__s __a__ strange__ dream__ isn__'__t __it?_

~~~~~**Vol.****02: ****Light ****in**** Darkness**~~~~~

Where am I?

I've just been running... trying to get away...all this construction...even if I've been here before I wouldn't know it...

~~~~~Scene001: Old City Redevelopment Area~~~~~

I need to rest. I can barely see a thing here.

That ghost...was that Boogiepop? No that's just a urban legend right? It can't be real. I need to sit down. Get a grip on things...

Sitting isn't helping. But I need to catch my breath. That was just an illusion earlier. It had to be. Boogiepop wouldn't come after me anyway, I'm too weak. Frail. I'm not a hero like Ranma was. It would make sense for Boogiepop to take him, but me? No it's not her.

But then what was it?

It doesn't make sense! None of this makes any sense! Fairy tale spirits out to get me, bugs that only I can see...I don't understand! Why is this happening to me?

~~~~~Furinkan High School Senior, Class 1: **Daisuke**** Jounochi**~~~~~

~~~~~Scene002: Elementary School~~~~~

I remember...

Ever since I was a kid, I wanted to be a hero.

When I was in grade school and I saw some bullies beating on some kid, I'd fight them. Even if they were bigger, older or tougher than me.

This one time a sixth grader was giving us fourth graders all sorts of trouble during recess. Terrorizing us really. He'd make us give him lunch money and push us around. I wasn't having it and so I beat the bastard.

"This is our playground!" I said, kicking him while he lay in a heap on ground, "Don't bother us anymore!"

I let him up, "Okay okay damn it!" he said, his arm across his eyes. "But, I won't forget this!" and he ran off.

"You made a sixth-grader cry!" the other kids cried.

"You're the best, Dai-chan!"

Yeah. That was me. And that's what I always wanted to be.

~~~~~darkness~~~~~

I'm laughing out loud. It's so damn funny. I'm such a wuss now...such a weakling.

I feel so crappy inside. "Shit," I say to myself.

It's not simple like it was back then. It's all twisted and weird...

I hear a sound and turn to see a fat white caterpillar with red spots crawling on the ground next to some pipes leaning against the wall. I edge near it, feeling that need I've been feeling well up inside me. I pick it up. It feels all squishy and smooth. It excretes some kind of sticky fluid on my hand. I'm laughing again, because I can't help myself. I have to do it. I have to!

I bring the thing closer to me...and I bite off its head with my teeth. I shove it into my mouth, tearing into it, letting its juices roll around my tongue before swallowing. But it's not sweet like the spiders were. It's...bitter. I start to choke.

~~~~~congratulations~~~~~

It reminds me of the celebration dinner I had after graduating Junior High.

"Congratulations, Daisuke!" my mother exclaimed after setting my plate down in front of me.

Mom was a wonderful cook. The meal she prepared for me then was worthy of a medal, garnished with parsley and served on rice... I never got to taste it. Not that night anyway.

Dad was beaming "You did great!".

"But you're going to a new school now," Mom said, setting Dad's plate down, "aren't you going to miss your old friends?"

Dad chuckled. "You'll be fine, right Daisuke?"

"Yep," I agreed.

Mom sat down with her own meal. "Well, let's eat!"

"Down the hatch!" I said...only when I brought the chopsticks with the morsel of food to my mouth, an excruciating pain jangled the nerves all the way up my arm. It was so sudden that I fell out of my seat. I cried out and cradled my arm.

"Daisuke!" Dad cried

Mom was out of her seat, screeching, "Daisuke, what's wrong?"

I couldn't respond. The pain was...too much.

~~~~~Scene003: Prefectural Hospital~~~~~

"A malignant bone tumor?" My mother asked Dr. Kisugi in the same worried screeching voice the next day.

I was in a hospital bed overhearing her conversation as Dad looked over me. They had one of those oxygen tubes sticking in my nose and an IV sticking into my arm. I watched Mom and the woman doctor as they talked under the glowing X-Rays that spelled out my doom.

"Luckily," Dr. Kisugi said, "we found it in its early stages. But even after the operation, he'll need therapy for at least two or three years."

It wasn't until she said that that I realized what my illness meant. For two to three years, I'd be weak. Too weak to train. Too weak to save anyone. Too weak to be a hero.

"I see..." Mom almost whispered, bowing and walking over to me. She brushed her fingers through my hair, trying to comfort me, but the life that I knew was over, and for some reason, I couldn't look at my mom. I could only watch Dr. Kisugi as she looked straight at me, eyes cold, half-lidded. Her mouth was straight, emotionless. Still, sometimes when I remember it, I can almost swear that she smiled...just a little, as if she thought the whole thing was funny.

~~~~~Scene004: First Year High School Spring~~~~~

I could hear them talking about me behind my back when School started again. Anytime I heard laughter I always thought it was about me—that weird Freshman that's sick all the time...who's always leaving class early to go to the hospital. Now, I figure I was being a little paranoid, but I was right enough times for it to be depressing.

~~~~~hospital~~~~

The prefectural hospital has a large waiting area, with many seats lined up in rows, like in an airport. Only there aren't so many windows and at the front is the window where you make appointments or get prescriptions for medication. One day I heard a girl laughing while I was sitting in there and I listened in as usual to see if it really was about me or not. She was two rows behind me and talking to some guy.

"So what do you think, Sensei?" The girl asked her companion in a more serious voice.

"I don't know," he responded, "Not many people can do what they want to do." I looked behind me. The girl was about my age and had her hair in a style that looked sort of like a helmet. It didn't seem right for the girl to call the guy "Sensei." He was kind of young to be teacher or doctor but then again, he was definitely older than twenty. He wore glasses and what looked like a brown martial arts gi.

"But still," the girl said, "that doesn't mean people shouldn't think about what they want to do with their lives!"

The guy smiled. "So tell me, 'Sensei' Tendo Nabiki, what would you like to be?"

"I don't know just yet, that's why I was asking you! Have you ever wanted to be something else, Doctor?"

"Let's see," he said rubbing his chin, "probably...a defender of justice."

"Surely, you can't be serious." Nabiki smirked.

"I am and don't call me 'Surely'" the doctor said smiling a little himself. He sat down next to Nabiki. "I'm first and foremost a doctor, but I am also a student of the Art. Sometimes, I would like nothing better than to wander around the countryside helping those in need, defending the weak...As a doctor, you can only help those that come to you, after whatever's been done to them has already happened, and you sometimes can't use something that you know will help somebody because it isn't covered by insurance. I'd like to not have to worry about insurance. I'd like to just fight evil head on...a defender of justice. That's what I want to be."

"Then be one," Nabiki said. "I'm sure you could do it."

The doctor laughed, "It's not that easy!"

Nabiki laughed as well until Dr. Kisugi came to remind her of her appointment. Nabiki said goodbye to the man and left with Kisugi.

This was the first time I'd ever ran into Nabiki. Of course I heard stories. They said she was heartless, that even though she was only a Sophomore, she was a loan shark and the head of several gambling rackets across the high school, and a girl willing to sell out even her own sister if the price was right. Suddenly I was more interested. What was she doing in the hospital? What was she really like?

Of course after Ranma came I would run into Nabiki more than enough times, and I'd learn to accept nearly every rumor about her. But I still remember that conversation...

Later I found out the other doctor was Dr. Tofu. A real friendly guy. Just a chiropractor and general practitioner but very good at what he does. I guess he must have taken Nabiki to the hospital. He was pretty close to the Tendo family back then. He left like, two years ago though. I don't think anyone's seen him.

At that moment in the hospital, I hated his guts. He could still help people. He could, if he wanted to, be just the sort of hero I had always wanted to be, but he was a doctor instead. Meanwhile I was sick, weak.

I clasped my hands together so hard they ached several hours afterward.

~~~~~Scene:005 First Year High School Fall~~~~~

Ranma came.

I gravitated to him so strongly I was worried for a while that I was gay. And when I found out about his curse...There were nights I wished he would stay female so I could be Ranma's boyfriend. But the attraction wasn't really sexual. I mean girl Ranma was a hottie, there's no denying that, but that's not why I hung out with him. Ranma was just everything I ever wanted to be. Ranma was a hero. Ranma had adventure every single day. Ranma had all sorts of people that admired him. I just was hoping that somehow the tinniest fraction of that would rub off on me.

I wasn't alone of course. Hiroshi hung out with Ranma just as much as I did, though he seemed more interested in Ranma's fiancées then Ranma himself most the time. Hiroshi and I became friends through Ranma.

I remember I sat next to Hiroshi during that match girl Ranma had with Kuno's sister. Hiroshi was putting all the girls on a scale from one to ten. He was saying that Kodachi was a nine and I said, "No way she's a nine! She has to get negative points for being psychotic!" Before I knew it, I was comparing other girls to female Ranma and Akane based on breast size, cuteness, shapeliness...I'm telling you, perversion is contagious.

At the time of that match, neither of us knew that male Ranma and female Ranma were one and the same. Hiroshi roped me into confronting Ranma about the girl that shared his name. We heckled him about keeping the cute redhead to himself, but he got out of it somehow.

I was the one who found out first. I went to Nabiki for information during lunch one day, and of course she wasn't giving it unless I paid a sum of money no mere human could possess. But then I had an idea. No one knew anything about Nabiki going to the hospital. Maybe it was something she didn't want getting around? So I took a chance and said that if she didn't tell me about Ranma's connection to girl Ranma I would mention Nabiki's visit to the hospital. Nabiki got this sharp look to her eye and peered right into me, and I knew that if she said no I wouldn't do anything. I knew that I had potentially made a very bad enemy. But then she gave a smirk. "Ranma got a curse in China. He turns into a girl when he's splashed with cold water. Test it if you don't believe me." Then she picked up her bento and moved to where some other girls were talking, pointedly ignoring anything else I may have had to say.

I got Hiroshi to help me and we did test it, using a fire bucket to splash Ranma as he left the building for Gym.

Neither of us had ever come so close to death.

Thankfully, I told Ranma where I got the information before he pummeled us into pancakes, and I think he actually opened up to us more once we both knew about the curse and didn't totally freak or anything. Some of the other guys in gym found out about it too, and from then on Ranma had to take his showers in the coach's private shower to keep the would-be pranksters at bay, but after that day he never mentioned it. Ranma just didn't hold grudges. At least not back then. He was still friendly to Hiroshi and me even when things started to get bad...

~~~~~hospital~~~~~

I was almost late to my doctor's appointment that day I remember. Dr. Kisugi didn't seem to mind and I sat on the couch in her office. It's a brightly lit place, sunshine filters through Venetian blinds covering large windows that take up almost entire walls. You can see the trees waving outside and it should be very pleasant, but I hated going to that office just the same. After giving me a short physical, Dr. Kisugi said that I was getting better, and that it would only be a little longer before I could stop the therapy.

But Ranma had told us that he had trained since he was a baby in the Art, that every spare moment of his life was spent perfecting his form, learning new techniques... There was no way I would ever catch up to him. "It's already too late," I told Dr. Kisugi

"Eh?"

"No matter how hard I try now," I said punching the air and imagining that I was Ranma, that I was fighting Kuno or Ryoga, or anyone... "I'll never be good enough to be a master of the Art. I'll never be able to be a hero."

"Jounochi-kun, listen..." Kisugi said, "The human body's abilities are not limited to only the physical..."

"I know, I know. 'Study hard and use your mind to help people.' Is that what you're gonna say? My mother says the same thing."

Kisugi held her head up with her hand, her elbow on the counter behind her where she kept her potted plants. "You're so weak, but your mother is so strong."

I frowned, saying, "I already know."

"Yes... but cowards live longer than most people, hmm?"

I looked at Kisugi-sensei in surprise. She was smiling lazily, and again I got that paranoid feeling that someone was laughing at me.

"It's when people are full of fear that the angel of death comes, and she prefers it when strong people get scared; they taste better. Weak people taste terrible."

It was a very strange thing for a doctor to say. Strike that, it was an unbelievably freaky thing for _anyone_ to say. Even now, I wonder if I maybe misunderstood her somehow, but before I could ask her to repeat what she had said she continued.

"If you want it," she crossed her legs and turned her swivel chair more toward me, "I have a special medicine I can give you, but I don't know if it will work for you, understand?"

~~~~~darkness~~~~~

I stagger and fall against a pile of pipes. I feel sick to my stomach now after eating that damned caterpillar. And I still feel the hunger...the need. The caterpillar didn't help at all.

Dr. Kisugi's medicine didn't help at all either when I took it. I had a high fever and was in bed for a week.

~~~~~Happy Ending~~~~~

Over the next two years. Hiroshi and I still followed Ranma around like puppies, catching whatever scraps of adventure or exposed female flesh we could get. But both of us could tell something was up with Ranma. Last year especially, there were these times when he'd get real quiet. We used to cheer him up by teasing him about his fiancées, but more and more, that became a sore subject with him.

Of course I guess I really can't blame him. He had a lot of things pressing on him. First, there was Ranma's mom, who kept saying she'd kill him if he wasn't manly, then there was that stupid wedding, where Shampoo and Ukyo went psycho and started throwing bombs at the guy. Things just went downhill from there. Even Cologne reprimanding Shampoo for her behavior and moving back to the village didn't seem to cheer Ranma up. Sometimes he would just show up at Hiroshi's or my house uninvited and not tell us why.

Then last year, Hiroshi had to go away for a few months because his grandfather was dying. Looking back on it, I think that I was maybe the only friend Ranma really had at that point. I mean, he had other people, but they weren't exactly people he could talk to. Not that he talked to me either. I mean you can't just tell a guy all your problems. Not unless he's a shrink or something.

I tried to get Ranma to train me a little, and that seemed to cheer him up a bit, but he was still moody. I keep on thinking about his most frequent complaint at that time, that everyone wanted something from him.

I hate thinking about it...but if you had to not want anything from Ranma to be his friend...then I really wasn't his friend either. Because I wanted his power, his strength, his fearlessness...and when he stopped being powerful, strong, and fearless...I didn't hang around him as much.

I would almost talk to him during lunch when I saw him staring out of the window forlornly. I would think about visiting him at the dojo when I passed by. I would consider maybe giving him a call. But each time I thought about seeing Ranma, I would think better of it. Or worse of it I suppose. Ranma was depressing to be around then, and without Hiroshi's boundless enthusiasm, I just was not capable of dealing with it.

When the news leaked about Ranma and Kodachi, I wasn't that surprised really. Kodachi was after all, an extremely proud person who didn't give a damn about what other people thought, and I think that's what Ranma wanted to be.

I never really believed the part of the rumor that said he was dealing drugs. Taking drugs yes—maybe wanted whatever Kodachi was smoking—but dealing drugs...not Ranma. Even as down as he was, I don't think he'd ever do something so...ugly.

Things got real tense after the school found out about Ranma and Kodachi. He showed up to class a few times, wearing all black. I approached him once to ask him if he wanted to train me some. Real stupid I know, but I didn't want to just ask him the same stupid questions he was laughing at the other people for asking. All the same, he just said "Get the fuck out of my face," and walked on.

This one day a new girl showed up. She had straight pitch black hair with two white streaks. Her face was as pale as a corpse, and adorned with a good seven piercings, heavy black eye shadow, and black lipstick She wore fishnet stockings with her school uniform which was ripped and ragged.

When the teacher called Ranma's name, she raised her hand.

She was laughing the rest of the day. It was Ranma's laugh, not nearly as bone rattling as Kodachi's, but it had some of the same mania, and just knowing that it was Ranma and not Kodachi made it even scarier. She came up to me that day. She asked me if I wanted to have sex. "I'm offerin my virgin pussy. One time only!"

I refused. It was just wrong...but now I wonder...maybe if I went with Ranma even then and just talked to her...And Ranma was dead serious. After I declined she called me a limp dick and asked where Kuno was. She said she figured she might as well keep it in the family.

Kuno never showed again after that. No one even saw him. I guess he took "the pigtailed girl" up on her offer.

She showed up in the same get up all that week. One time, Ukyo splashed her with hot water and she didn't change. She smiled and said "I'm pregnant."

Then a week later Ranma showed up as a guy. I asked him what happened. He smiled and said "I got an abortion."

That was the last time I talked to him. I could have maybe understood if he gave some indication that the decision was hard for him, really any lame excuse for not having the baby would have worked for me, but he just didn't care. It was like he got the abortion on a whim, like he could have just as easily had the baby and tortured it to death. He wasn't a hero anymore. No, far from it.

I avoided him after that. It wasn't that hard really; he only showed up in school once or twice a week and sometimes not even that. I'd sometimes see him talking to girls in the hallway. Those girls never came back to school. I kept telling myself that they just quit, but...

Then about a month ago...

~~~~~screaming~~~~~

I was standing on the second story terrace of my house, watching the cars as they traveled under the street lights, as if nothing was happening, as if everything were still normal.

I heard it before I saw it. This terrible inhuman sound of pain, anguish that somehow carried through the night. Then there was the light coming from Furinkan High School shooting up into the clouds. The sound was even louder, a mix between a pulsating crackle of electricity and a haunting moan, like from a ghost. It resonated with my insides like the bass line of a rock concert. Then I saw this ball of energy come from the beam directly toward me...and through me, jazzing my nerves like a high voltage caffeine pill.

I turned around to see the energy pass through the rest of the house without affecting anything. I looked at my shaking hands for a moment not sure of what just happened. Then I went inside through the sliding glass door, suddenly feeling violently ill.

Once again, I had a high fever and was laid up for a week. It felt almost as bad as when I took Dr. Kisugi's medicine. But this time, after the fever broke, something happened.

~~~~~morning~~~~~

After waking up for the first time without throwing up, I got dressed and walked downstairs, sliding the wooden door to the den. Dad was on his knees on the tatami, praying to Mom's shrine. Hearing me enter, he looked back to me. Judging by the bags under his eyes he had been up all night. "Are you alright?" He asked wearily.

"Yeah," I looked at the picture of Mom. She was smiling in the photograph, but it was a sort of Mona Lisa smile. I could see the sadness in her bright eyes, the frown in her gentle smile. It was taken after I got sick, a year before she died. "I'll be fine."

He got up creakily to his feet, "I was worried about you, it's been almost a week."

There was something on his chest. A giant green spider, right over his heart. I gasped in shock.

"What's the matter?" Dad asked.

"Dad, there's a bug..."

"Hmm?" he walked over to me and felt my forehead with the back of his hand. "No, your fever's dropped." He sighed as he walked past me, "I've got to go to work now. How do you feel? Do want to take another day off?"

"N..no," I said. "I'm going today."

"Good."

I thought I had to be hallucinating or something. Why couldn't Dad see that giant spider? Still, I went to school. On the subway, on the street, everywhere I saw people with spiders on their chests, walking around completely oblivious. Then, for some reason...I started salivating...the spiders began to look tasty.

~~~~~class~~~~~

"Oki?"

"Yeah."

"Tamura?"

"Here!"

~~~~~Scene006: Furinkan High School~~~~~

Omo-sensei was giving out test grades in history class. Of course he wouldn't be calling my name, because I had been sick. I just watched as the other students got their grades.

"Sasaoka?"

"Yes..." this one said quietly as she got up to and walked to Omo-sensei's podium.

"You scored the highest with a 98" Omo-sensei informed her.

She took the test with her head bowed and started walking slowly back to her seat. She was fairly pretty, with her hair rich brown hair curling all the way to her shoulders, she seemed depressed though.

"You did great Yuka!" Akane praised her friend as she passed several rows ahead of me. "Just like always!"

As Sasaoka Yuka approached me, I saw it though. A purple spider, right over her heart. As Omo-sensei called out the other students' names I kept my attention focused on Yuka as she sat in the back row... I remembered she usually sat in the front.

~~~~~outside~~~~

I talked to her after class and asked her to meet me at the back wall of the school during lunch. She was a little late. I almost thought she wouldn't come, but she did.

"What do you want?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

I lifted myself off the wall I'd been leaning on before I spoke. "About the test..."

Yuka's eyes widened and she let out an involuntary gasp.

I stepped in front of her. I was almost certain now of the answer to the question I was about to ask but I asked it anyway. "Did you cheat?"

Her fists tightened on either side of the blue skirt of her uniform and she started sobbing, tears streaming down her face. I look at her chest. The spider grew to twice its original size, speckled now with red spots.

I couldn't help myself! I undid her tie and slipped my hand underneath her blouse and grabbed the spider.

I held it out in front of my face for a moment. It felt warm on my hand, it smelled vaguely of vanilla. "You may go now," I told Yuka, who had collapsed into a sitting position by the wall.

She blinked and stood up. "Yes, you're right." She said and started to walk away. "Daisuke," She stopped and turned around, looking at her feet, "I don't know why but," She looked me in the eye just then, "Thank you."

Once she was gone, I bit into the spider with gusto.

It tasted... pretty sweet.

~~~~~nightstreet~~~~~

The next spider I ate was yellow, with red spots. It came from a woman on her way back from work that night. She was wearing a black skirt and blazer with a maroon blouse. She had just given her boss a blow job so she could get promoted.

The spider was large and messy, but it tasted so good, so sweet, I wolfed it up, tore into it. Its legs dangled from my mouth as the juices from its body ran down my chin.

Regret...guilt...remorse...Those feelings turn the knots in one's heart into the spiders. I've removed these bugs from so many people...

~~~~~delirious~~~~~

Just a few days ago, I went to the Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics Tournament. It was held at Furinkan this year, and it was actually a lot more interesting to watch than I would have thought, but still, I was restless. Those spiders tasted so good...I wanted more. I got out of my seat after this one fight between Ukyo and another girl I didn't know. Ukyo was really intense and she somehow learned a weird ki technique...The spider on her chest almost covered her leotard. It was frightening...but it made me hungry.

I left the Gymnasium and I wandered around the halls of Furinkan, trying to find someone with a spider by themselves so that I could take it from them. I saw the school nurse heading to her office. She had a big one on her heart. So I followed her inside.

She looked up at the ceiling, sitting on her chair as I grabbed her spider. "I'm sorry," she said, "I had to have the abortion...I had to!"

I didn't really care what she said though. I just tore into the red and green spider, ripping off it's legs then its head than finally eating the rest of it.

~~~~~Penalty Taker~~~~~

Then she blinked, got up, and asked me if I could watch the office for a little while.

I stood there for a while looking out the window, thinking. Something was nagging at me about the woman but I couldn't tell what.

Then I heard the door slide open and shut again and a quiet female voice say "Please excuse my rudeness." I looked behind me. The girl who came in wore a Hebereke High jogging suit and had her hair in large pigtails that fell on her shoulders and seemed somehow conservative. They looked a little like the collar of a coat turned up. I realized this was the girl that had fought with Ukyo in the last match I saw. And then I saw that she had a spider of her own on her chest.

She threw a tissue or something into the trash and looked up. She seemed a little surprised to see me there; so I said, "The nurse isn't here."

That was all, and then I went for the spider without really thinking. The girl stepped back though, then she seemed to want to get past me but I advanced on her again, knowing that once I ate the spider she wouldn't remember anything I did. I had her pinned against the medicine supply cabinet. "Don't move!" I said, reaching for her chest.

She stepped back, startled, into the cabinet, knocking over two bottles of medicine. One crashed into the floor, the other hit and rolled toward my foot. The sound seemed a little louder than it should have been...distorted.

If I hadn't just eaten a spider I might not have notice it, but there was something different about this girl. Almost as if she _wanted_ her spider to be there. "I'm sorry," I said. I never had to explain myself before; so I just tried the truth. "There's a bug attached to your heart. I understand if you don't want me to touch you, but if you let it, that bug is going to completely devour you."

The girl eyes went wide "Huh?"

I tried to explain: "It's that knot you feel inside your heart. I've been able to see these things recently."

This made her more frightened though and she started backing away from me, toward the door.

"You've been keeping your feelings bottled up, haven't you? For a long time now." I smiled, giving up. "I'm Daisuke Jounochi, a senior." I moved past her, sliding open the door to go out. I turned back, though, to say, "Let me know if you ever want me to grope your chest. It's better than letting that bug eat you up, right?" I chuckled and left her in the office.

_Yes,_ I thought as I left her there, _I__'__m__helping__these__people._I stepped outside onto the stairs leading to the roof and looked out across the city. _I__'__m__a__savior__to__them._

I was a hero, I realized. And I laughed in joy.

~~~~~Pone~~~~~

That night, when I got home, I ate the spider in Dad's chest. The sunset coming through the window onto the tatami in front of Mother's shrine I told him, "Dad, you're better now."

He got up from his knees turned and, as if caught in a reverie said, "Oh yeah, time for dinner..." and walked to the kitchen.

I glanced a my mother's picture, thinking of how proud she would be of me if she knew what I was doing and tore into Dad's spider.

~~~~~sirens~~~~~

Several months ago, I came home to find a large group of people standing around my house behind police tape. Lights from ambulances and police cars flashed blue and red at me, and I knew something was wrong, but I still had no idea what.

I pushed through the crowd to the police line where an officer told me to stand back. I saw my father watching as the paramedics wheeled a stretcher into the back of an ambulance. He turned, and seeing me, said out loud, "Daisuke..."

Then I saw Mom's car. The windshield was covered in blood, the passenger window too, and her shoe...I saw her shoe on the pavement blood splattered all over it, and I knew...I _knew..._ "Mother!" I screamed... "Mother!"

The next day the paper read "Afternoon Murder: Serial Killer Strikes Again" The article explained how my mother's gruesome death fit the M.O. of the serial killer that had slain people five years ago. He had just started up again recently.

On her way to pick me up from the hospital...my mother was murdered by the serial killer who had been terrorizing the city. My father never forgave himself for letting her go alone.

We had a traditional Shinto funeral. Father kept looking at Mom's face during the viewing and crying anew. I knew, though, that Mom would have wanted me to be strong and so I helped Dad remember his duties to our guests at the viewing—greeting each one and thanking them for coming and asking if they would like to see the body—even though I just wanted to go to my room and cry my eyes out myself.

~~~~~twilight~~~~~

I ate Dad's spider. And I ate several spiders the next day.

I remember I ate a woman's spider underneath a bridge on the canal. Outside, above the power lines there was the aurora that had been there since that light a month ago...

That day I came home to find my Dad looking at Mom's picture again, only this time it was in his hands and he seemed to have a confused expression on his face.

"Daisuke..." He said, "This woman...who is she?"

I gasped. Something wasn't right...

~~~~~class~~~~~

I saw Yuka the next day, in Math class, cheating on her practice exam...

~~~~~night street~~~~~

I went to the arcade that night and watched all the people there, playing games, going on dates, trying to forget all their troubles when the reality finally hit me. What I had been eating...was their memories.

"Isn't better for bad memories to simply be forgotten?" I asked one girl in an alley way when she thought I was molesting her. Of course she didn't say anything.

I was eating her spider that night...or maybe it was somebody else's...when a light shone on me in the dark. It was a cop. He had a broad face with chiseled features. "What are you doing here?"

"Nothing," I said and walked off, but the look the cop gave me...it was like he knew...

~~~~~morning street~~~~~

I didn't go home that night. I stayed up looking for spiders all along the city streets. By that morning I was weak, worn out, exhausted. I needed spiders...bugs...

I leaned against the side of a building to rest for a while, when I saw a girl sitting in the sidewalk in a very pink, very frilly skirt. It was Shiratori Asuza, I remembered her from the "Charlotte Cup" but she seemed even less coherent than usual.

She laughed and smiled at me. She lifted her hands up palms together with the tips of her fingers pointed toward me. When she separated her hands there was a glowing butterfly that fluttered toward me.

"A bug..." I murmured hoping this would be as good as a spider...but it wasn't. It wasn't good at all.

I had tried to forget it, to erase it from my mind, but when the butterfly touched me I was brought back to that night I saw Ranma...

~~~~night street~~~~

The girl with the glasses was dead, bleeding profusely from a deep bite mark on her neck. Cradling her, smiling predatorily as she knelt on the ground, was Kodachi. Smiling exactly the same way...was Ranma, standing over her...as if he were proud...

"What the...What the hell is this?"

~~~~~delirious~~~~

I was back on the street looking at Asuza sitting there smiling at me...

"What was that?"

I didn't wait for an answer. I ran away.

I'm such a coward.

I ran to the business district, where strings of people were coming and going. It started to rain, I was soaked and tired and weak...I needed bugs...but when I saw a woman with a spider and I called out to her...

There was that cop, across the street, looking at me...watching me...

The woman asked me what I wanted.

"Nothing." I said and walked off.

Night again and I needed bugs.

I found another woman with a spider and I was eating it...eating her memories when out of nowhere it appeared...no _materialized_ in front of me.

The angel of death. The Grim Reaper. The Black Hat. Boogiepop...But that wasn't what scared me...what scared me was the face it wore. The face I could not drive out of my memory...the face of Kuno Kodachi.

"What the...? What do you want?" I demanded as I started running, scrambling down the street.

The street light seemed to drift past me as I ran through the mist, and then, right in front of me, Boogiepop materialized in a flash of light again, blocking my path.

That black shadow followed me everywhere. It was Death!

And now here I am in the dark, not even sure of where I am, trying to hide from what I thought until now was just an urban legend. An urban legend that wore the face of Ranma's seducer… of the murderer of so many girls that I did nothing to help...

_Why__ would __she __eat__ me?_ I wonder _I __would__ taste__ terrible!__ A __coward__ like __me..._

"Is there anybody there?" The voice is sweet, human, recognizable... And I realize that I am sitting between the angel of death and...

"Tendo Nabiki?" The apparition asks in an odd voice that seems to come from several directions at once.

"Boogiepop?" Nabiki asks in kind. She has longer hair now and she's dressed in elbow and knee pads and holding some sort of rectangular device in her hand. "No! You're the Manticore!" She reaches behind her and brings out a crossbow and aims it at the ghost-like figure.

"No," the figure says, "I am Boogiepop."

Nabiki turns her head to me: "Daisuke, get the hell out of here! Now!"

I do what she says. I run as fast as I can, but I'm nearly out of breath after two steps. All I've had to eat for two days are bugs, and I haven't had any sleep and I've been running all night...

I trip and fall face down on the concrete. I remember the conversation between Tofu and Nabiki:

"_So tell me, 'Sensei' Tendo Nabiki, what would you like to be?"..."I'd like to just fight evil head on...a defender of justice. That's what I want to be."_

"_Then be one! I'm sure you could do it."_

I get up from the ground, chuckling in spite of myself from the irony. Is Nabiki a defender of justice? It hardly seems fair...

I feel a rush of air and an electric charge as Boogiepop—or is it the Manticore?— materializes in front of me.

"Have you been waiting long?" she asks coolly in her strange, organically electronic voice. "It took me a while to get rid of her."

"Are you going to kill me?" I ask.

"No, I'm not going to kill you." She points a finger at my chest and I look down.

Every spider I've ever eaten is there. Ever color, every variety, they're all there eating me up inside...

~~~~~cathedral~~~~~

"I'm just here to take you there." A brilliant light envelopes me and the apparition. Inside the light I see...my classmates... from so long ago...when I was still strong...when I was a hero.

"Dai-chan! Over here!" they beckon.

I'm laughing now. Tears of joy stream down my face. "Everyone's here," I say, and I join them...forever.

~~~~class

_You're eating lunch when you hear the news. "Did you hear?" a girl you know starts, "Jounochi from Class 1...He disappeared!"_

"_It's been awhile," another girl says._

"_Since what?" you ask._

"_Since anyone disappeared."_

_You pass by Class 1 on the way to the bathroom and you notice an empty desk. It seems eerie, but...it couldn't be the same person that was in your dream...could it?_

~~~~~[END]~~~~~

People who accept the world...

In this world, everything exists...

Anything can happen...

And...

Everything does happen...

All the time.

Next Chapter: Life Can Be So Nice


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